Long story short I (F30) am married to a man (30). Our bedroom is hanging by a thread. We aren’t in a “dead” bedroom but if we don’t make improvements that’s where it is heading. Part of the issue is he doesn’t talk to me. He doesn’t like to have fun discussions/ banter. Wears his head phones at the dinner table after multiple request that he didn’t and that’s just what should be the light/ fun stuff. If it’s a controversial conversation about us, our lives etc he moves through the conversation as quickly as possible. Not quite shutting it down all together but obviously not wanting to have a thorough discussion so I can never fully express myself. I have talked t his mother and even she admitted she has never been able to get him to open up. I’m growing resentful and as a result our sex life is suffering because it feels like you can’t be bothered to talk to me but you want sex? He seems completely fine if not just preferring a surface level relationship with me. I could go days not really speaking to him he won’t ask what is wrong. I can’t tell if he doesn’t want to know or doesn’t care. We both watch porn so there’s that. I don’t even care that he watches porn but it explains why he isn’t vocal about our lack of sex. It’s not like him to bring up an issue anyway like stated before. I’m at a loss. I don’t want a dead bedroom but I need true intimacy. I need more then hi and bye in the morning. Please don’t suggest couples counseling. If he won’t even talk to me why would he talk to a therapist. I have suggested it for a whole year he never went. I ended up going by myself and am still in it. His own mom could get him to go as a child. I’m giving up. Don’t know what to do. submitted by /u/Exotic_Fisherman_223
Originally posted by u/Exotic_Fisherman_223 on r/AskMen