I dated someone I’ve known since high school, 20 years ago. We dated briefly during school and then lost touch when she left town to go to college and I started my career and worked insane hours. We reconnected as friends a few times over the years and then found each other in a dating app about 2 years ago. We dated for a year and a half, and were very compatible in some ways, but very not in others. Eventually, she decides she just doesn’t want to date anyone anymore. It sucks, break up is upsetting as always. But we keep talking every day anyway. Still very good friends and connected to each other. 6 months later, recent to now, she has a conversation with me where it sounds like she has an issue with our friendship because she knows I still have romantic interest in her even though I don’t speak about it ever. After that, I kinda had it stuck in my head, so I called her the next day to ask if there was anything I should do differently to make her more comfortable, again still confused because my only offense as far as I can tell is thought crime at this point. She says that I never did anything specifically and therefore nothing I can or should do, so we are on the same page, right? Then she asks me what I am doing, I say just relaxing and doing nothing, because I had a tiring day. Then she asks if I still think about her, I say all the time. She says that sounds unsafe and scary. At that point I tell her if she feels scared of me, I will no longer contact her and end the conversation. Two days later she sends a message to me, trying to clarify her opinion. It doesn’t really clarify anything further for me, and I tell her as much, but that I appreciate her trying to explain. Then today she sends me a couple of random messages that I don’t respond to for a while, mostly because I am confused as hell at this point. So I ask her “if you genuinely think I am scary and obsessed with you, why are you messaging me?” She responded with “You clearly didn’t understand what I was saying, but that is what you want, sure.” I am genuinely just completely confused. Am I misunderstanding something obvious to anyone else? submitted by /u/Rasp10
Originally posted by u/Rasp10 on r/AskMen