Hey, everybody I am a 25 year old male and as the title suggests. I’ve been dealing with genital dermatillomania for most of my life now. I recently got a name for my bad habit and have been giving it a lot of research and thought but something in me wanted to come on here and share my experience. If you don’t know, “genital dermatillomania” is the term for a kind of addiction one can have that leads to abnormal or excessive picking at the skin of one’s private areas due to lack of confidence, lack of self control, boredom, body dysmorphia, etc. lots of things seem to contribute to someone picking at their skin down there compulsively and it affects men and women alike. For some background to my own life. I started masturbating at an extremely young age. My first memories were from 2nd grade and I became addicted to adult content and masturbation by 3rd grade. So by 8 or 9 years old I was consuming large amounts of adult content and touching myself excessively on a daily basis. This led to lots of issues early on such as really bad constant anxiety. I was too young to understand it then but looking back I created a lifestyle for myself that ensured I lived in state of always comparing myself to others and never feeling sufficient. I started to notice enlarged fordyce spots and acne down on my privates really early on. With my already heightened anxiety from being an over weight kid that compulsively consumed adult material and masturbated, at some point I began obsessing over these spots and began picking at them to the extreme. I thought and still somewhat believe that these acne and enlarged fordyce spots down there make me gross or unattractive to a woman. Fast forward to today and I have pretty bad scarring all over the underside of my penis. As well as a decent amount on my sack. I am now constantly over thinking about these scars which I believe is leading me to over analyze my penis still and is making the cycle unstoppable. Here’s how last night went. I noticed I had a decent sized fordyce spot on my balls and decided it was big enough that it needed to come out. (I have done this enough to be able to extract the entire fordyce spot, in most cases.) So I went ahead and got it out which led to a decent sized cut that was bleeding a lot. While getting that one out I noticed 2 others in the same area that my impulsive brain decided has to come out as well. So, after about 30 min of picking I got all 3 of them out and the area was really sore and still bleeding. Most people at this point would ask them selves “wtf” and look at themselves in disgust. While I wasn’t happy with myself in the moment I took a break and went on with my night but about an later I decided to go and check one more time for anything else that may need to come out. The way my brain thinks in the moment is that I already have these 3 bad cuts from what I just extracted so I already can’t have sex for at least the next week. I may as well go and get every fordyce spot extracted now so they all heal at the same time and I don’t prolong my lack of being able to be sexually active any longer. This cycle never ends. I end up causing more damage and scarring to my member and it’s destroying me mentally. I haven’t been sexually active in close to a year now. It has ruined basically every romantic relationship I’ve ever had because 1. It destroys my confidence and 2. Leads to long periods of me not being able to have sex with my partner which does its own damage to the relationship. Last night I messed up and went up my shaft further than usually and created a hole that is now incredibly bruised and still bleeding here and there. I know this is going to cause even more scarring which is going to make my mental image of my penis even worse than it already is. I’m open to anything people have to say or advice anyone can give. I’m at a complete loss at this point. Thanks if you made it this far. submitted by /u/Pretend_Eye_9954
Originally posted by u/Pretend_Eye_9954 on r/AskMen
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