My (40f) bf (37M) and I have been together 3.5 years. I moved in to his house at about 3 years. Our relationship was amazing prior to me moving in, he was loving and invested, the best relationship I’d ever had. But right as I moved in, he got distant. There is no sex (which on his end was always sparse, drinking is more interesting to him), little dating, no deep conversations. I feel like a check box in his day, like about 8pm he’ll come to the living room and suggest a tv show. He says things like “No, I dont want to you leave”. But he doesn’t say “I want you here”. I didn’t change anything on my part, he just lived alone all his life and now he doesn’t. It feels like he is afraid of me now. I feel like there is little I can do to make him happy. I tried talking about it several times but he was pretty closed off. It’s just pretty shocking to me. Not to mention, if we do split up, how do I prevent the same mistake when things were so wonderful until they weren’t?? Anyway…I just wonder how many of you identify with him and truly find your independence and control over life/your own finances preferable to relationships, even really good ones? I am a pragmatic person and feel like it’s a lost cause…any thoughts on whether that is too pessimistic? Thanks! submitted by /u/MildandWise
Originally posted by u/MildandWise on r/AskMen