My long term girlfriend(36F) came home today and immediately berrated me(39M) in front of her family members. After some time I discussed with her calmly that she can’t keep doing this kind of thing. We should demonstrate a ‘united front’ as a couple and quite frankly nobody deserves these kinds of interactions on a regular basis. I explicitly explained that her behavior hurts me and that I am willing to help her grow and change as person to overcome these problems. I am aware this is a learned behavior or trauma response and most likely stems from childhood experiences. I explained to her that she needs to change and become better, because I simply can’t handle regular abuse and I don’t think anyone deserves it. I threw olive branch after diplomatic helpful intention and she clearly stated: “I will not change.” I have began looking for a new place and she agrees the cat should go with me. I’m just baffled I guess… was it all a waste of time? What was the point? Why would a person acknowledge a legitimate problem, then refuse to grow and change? I realize there’s no saving it now, I just feel so lost and alone… submitted by /u/CoinAdvocate
Originally posted by u/CoinAdvocate on r/AskMen