I’m in my mid-to-late 30s, married with kids, and I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the trade-offs between different life paths. I love my family and I wouldn’t trade them, but I’d be lying if I said I don’t sometimes wonder what life would look like if I didn’t have the responsibilities I have now. I’m in a decent/high-earning career path, but because I have a family, high rent/cost of living, kids, bills, and all the normal adult responsibilities, it often feels like the money disappears before I ever get to feel “ahead.” I see people around my age without kids or without family responsibilities and I sometimes wonder if they’re quietly living a very different life- more savings, more travel, nicer clothes, nicer car, more freedom, less guilt spending money on themselves. For me, even buying myself something small can come with guilt because I immediately think about savings, the kids, the house deposit, the next bill, or whether I should be putting that money somewhere more responsible. At the same time, I know the bachelor life probably has its own trade-offs too- loneliness, lack of deeper purpose, no family milestones, no kids running around, no real “home team” behind you. So I guess my question is: For men in their 30s and 40s, especially those earning decent money, do you ever compare these two lives? Do family men fantasise about the freedom of being single with money? And do single/high-earning men ever look at family men and feel like they’re missing something deeper? Is it basically a trade-off either way? submitted by /u/Clear-Victory1956
Originally posted by u/Clear-Victory1956 on r/AskMen