TRIGGER WARNING: SA 3 years ago, while I was drunk (and my roommate), a guy (who was sober) who tried to have a three-way with us. I was vomiting before she ordered an uber to her apartment. She was really drunk too, but not at my level. We both drank the same but I was clearly incapacitated and blacked out while she remembered the entire thing. We were all 18. I was assaulted while she was out of the room, and he only left because I began to vomit while he tried to be intimate with her. I am repulsed by this happening. She will tell people like it is funny. I do not view sex as something casual at all. My partner and I are going to discuss why I am cutting her off. I don’t know how to tell him that I allowed myself to be with a trusting friend and a classmate that neither of us had a relationship with. I also don’t know how to tell him that I kept this friendship because I felt like maybe we both could bond over being victims. The person I confided in (who also, in my opinion, enabled my assault) spreads this around like it’s funny. She was not assaulted, I was. I am so scared to tell my partner. I hate that this has to be a conversation. I did not enjoy myself at all. He had sex me for a minute and I began to pass out after he got off of me and tried to corner my friend into having sex with him. He only left because I began to vomit all over myself. He has met her multiple times. To be honest, I have never sexually touched my best friend (we’ve kissed, but what drunk college girl hasn’t at some point? He also knows about that) and I don’t consider her a sexual partner. At no point have I touched my friend. I love my partner and I am now religious. He is religious as well. Do I go into detail? Do I be vague? He does know about this guy, he’s included in my body count. This is the text message I sent him: Mind you, before this, I said that I was cutting (N) off: Like a long text message and everything. It is a very long story that I do want to tell you in detail but basically she was complicit in my sexual assault three years ago and we were both taken advantage of by a sober ex classmate when I was incapacitated, but she was in a different room when it happened. She continuously makes jokes about it and I have been coming to terms with it for a very long time but I did want to tell you about this in the instance so that you can better understand TDLR: my best friend makes fun of a traumatic situation that I did not consent to and spreads it around, having a conversation with my partner about it on Friday and am unsure how to tell him. submitted by /u/ButterflyNo6998
Originally posted by u/ButterflyNo6998 on r/AskMen