If someone shows ire towards men as a whole, based on past behaviors of many men… do you feel like you should be excluded? Do you understand it? Would you just wish to discuss it? Is it fair or unfair? submitted by /u/Aggressive-Dot1944
Originally posted by u/Aggressive-Dot1944 on r/AskMen
Painting all men with the same brush is equivalent to painting everyone of a particular race with the same brush. It’s wrong, and society should codemn it. As a Hispanic male growing up poor in Los Angeles, I’ve been assaulted twice in my life, both times by a young black man. It is wrong for me to fear all young black men because of this.
This question is a refraction of women’s lived experiences viewed through the lens of a man-as-bystander and is, in my opinion, entirely erroneous by its nature, as asked. What’s being tiptoed around is, for example, how men and women both tell girls that you can’t trust boys. The men in a young woman’s life know what boys want and they’ll go out of their way to make macho noises about protection and shotguns on porches but not always will the educate the young men in their lives. And then as they grow up, women are raised seeing men let off of high profile rape charges so as not to ruin their promising careers, they see the stigma of single mothers, they see men taking away their rights to abort rape babies, they see alot. And they see it often and are forced by circumstances to think about it, always. “Am I safe?”
Their extended female friend groups have stunning amounts of sexual assault victims, something absurd like 70% of all women in the United States.
Like. The reality of the situation is that men are a vague threat right up until they either prove themselves to be an immediate threat or not a threat after all.
You get to choose how you feel about that but you do not get to pick and choose the reality we share, and the reality is men have a collective reputation, and have collectively earned their place as a general threat to safety and each and every one of us has to make peace with our place in that, and the only thing we can do is do right or do wrong by the women in our lives.
Same as it ever was, really. We can only be responsible for ourselves and recognize that part of women being responsible for themselves is being wary of men, to different extents, as a rule.
Men can’t tell girls what to expect from boys and then be mad when they grow up not to trust men, but neither should we grow up being viewed as potential criminals. Until young men are thoroughly and consistently taught how to not harm women and to truly believe in the actions and mindsets required, women have no choice to see ‘Men’ as a potential threat. You could meet 20,000 men in a year and only be raped by one, but you’ve still got next year, right? That’s the reality
Feel free to correct my numbers, I assure you the reality is worse
I only bear responsibility for my action. Mine alone. Does every woman bear responsibility for every woman who has made false accusation of abuse from a man? If the answer isn’t the same for either situation then you are a bigot.
