Short version: My fiancé’s best man hired escorts for his bachelor party even though my fiancé said he did not want that kind of night. Wedding is in 7 weeks and I feel devastated. I need outside perspective because I feel angry, humiliated, and confused. My fiancé and I are getting married in 7 weeks. He had his bachelor party yesterday. I found out that the group went to a strip club and then later had two women hired from an escort website come to the apartment/house where the party continued. The women were topless and wearing see-through underwear. I have seen evidence that this was arranged in advance as a “2 girls” job for a large group of men. It was not something that randomly happened. From what I now understand, the best man organised it. My fiancé says he had specifically told his best man he did not want that kind of bachelor party and did not want girls/escorts/lap dances involved. Despite that, the best man organised it anyway. The girls did dances for many of the men. From what I have been told, most or all of the other guys got lap dances. Three men also went upstairs with the girls. All three of them are married with children, and one guy has previously behaved inappropriately with one of my friends, so I already had concerns about his character. The important part is that everyone I have spoken to says my fiancé did not participate. His friends apparently kept pushing him to get a lap dance, but he said no. The girls have also confirmed that “nothing happened with the groom” and that they did not dance for him (once I managed to find out which girls they had hired i decided to hire them myself an hour to ask questions;). The girls also showed me their messages during the night and afterward discussing the evening so I feel quite confident that my fiance did nothing with the girls). So from what I know, he did not touch anyone, did not get a lap dance, and did not go upstairs. I am relieved about that. I do think it matters that he said no. But I am still furious and devastated that this happened at all. I feel like his best man completely disrespected me, my fiancé, and our upcoming marriage. I also feel humiliated that I have had to find out all these details about escorts, lap dances, and men going upstairs just weeks before my wedding. I do not know how to process this. Part of me feels like I should be grateful my fiancé refused and did not do anything. Another part of me feels sick that this was the environment around him and that his closest friends thought this was acceptable. I am also struggling with what to do about the best man and groomsmen. The best man is meant to stand beside my fiancé at our wedding, but he organised something my fiancé apparently said he did not want. It feels like the opposite of supporting our marriage. Am I overreacting for being this angry even though my fiancé did not personally participate? Would you still be upset? And how would you handle the best man/groomsmen after this? submitted by /u/Shoddy_Adeptness_272
Originally posted by u/Shoddy_Adeptness_272 on r/AskMen