I’ve been reflecting on my last relationship and realized something that surprised me. Sex and physical intimacy were some of the only moments where I truly felt loved, wanted, and chosen. Not just sex itself, but the closeness, attention, and warmth that came with it. Outside of that, I often felt emotionally unsure or distant, even though we were together. Since the breakup, I’ve noticed that what I miss isn’t just her, but the feeling of being desired and emotionally safe — and that feeling was strongly tied to intimacy. This made me wonder: Why did I need sex to feel loved? I know there’s a common narrative that women feel valued or loved through intimacy or being desired, but I don’t hear men talk about this nearly as much. As a man, it feels uncomfortable to admit that physical closeness was how I felt emotionally validated. I’m curious: • Have other men experienced this? • Is this about attachment, love languages, or emotional availability in the relationship? • How do you separate genuine emotional connection from seeking reassurance through intimacy? Not trying to blame anyone — just trying to understand myself better. submitted by /u/ImaginaryPhone2946
Originally posted by u/ImaginaryPhone2946 on r/AskMen
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