My husband and I got married recently. We’ve known each other for a year now and in our culture things move quickly so us getting married so soon it’s not a big deal at all. Anyways, after our wedding, I feel like he has been less and less verbally affectionate to me. Unless I beg him or ask him for reassurance, he doesn’t really compliment me or tell me I’m pretty or tell me he loves me. As a matter of fact, I don’t think he has ever told me he’s loved me unless I said it first. I know he does through his actions because he does things that many men in this world don’t for their woman. His entirely loyal to me and I have never, and will never question that. But after he was able to basically make things official with me, he’s stopped chasing me and stopped being verbally affectionate with me. If I ask him things like are you gonna miss me when I’m away for this trip? I’m going on, or do you think I look pretty or do you love me, he often turns these questions into ongoing endless annoying jokes. For example, “i’m gonna miss you, i’ll call you as much as i can though”, his response is “nah can’t wait to have a few weeks without you” as a joke. I’ll laugh the first few times, but then I’ll ask for reassurance of whether he’s being serious or not, and he will literally go on for hours hours with this joke and won’t give me the verbal affection that I need and just tell me that he’ll miss me. I know these things don’t seem like a big deal but to me it is because I feel like I’m constantly begging for verbal affection. I feel like I don’t get it at all and I’m treated more like a friend than a wife or someone he’s into. The only time in complemented is if we’re intimate. I just feel really lonely and unwanted. He does a lot of things for me, but I genuinely just want to hear the love in his voice. I’ve tried communicating this with him so many times how words of affirmation is my love language and I wanna hear him say those things to me and tell me I’m beautiful and tell me he loves me or misses me. I’ve communicated this maturely with him so many times. Each time after him constantly joking about the matter he will finally come to a conclusion and say that he will be more affectionate. But it’s still going on like this. It’s honestly affecting me and I don’t know what to do. How can I get through to him? at this point do I just give up and pull away and accept that I’m not gonna receive the affection that I’m seeking? submitted by /u/muzzyfairy
Originally posted by u/muzzyfairy on r/AskMen
You must log in or # to comment.