I’m 30m and never had a relationship, but I want to start trying more. Much of my adult life I had to prioritize rebuilding from some early failures and ended up focusing more on myself, which also made me a bit of loner and less socially outgoing. At this point, I have a good paying job, my own place, fit from working out/hiking, traveled, and generally good looking. I read a lot of history and other topics. Biggest flaw, I smoke a lot of weed. Girls do check me out and often try flirting, but I just can never lean into it in the moment. I don’t feel nervous, but it’s like my mind retreats from being a quick thinking witty person. Most people I can talk openly and freely to are people Ive built comfort with, but these are usually people through circumstance (like work). Like when I’m by myself, I’m eloquent af when thinking or talking to myself. I do a lot of self analysis and think hard about next moves, while also researching. And sing and go through conversations, or future conversations in my head very well. I’m very good in professional discourse or presentations, and even acting. Just not in authentic human interactions. Perhaps I’ve been in my head too much all these years. It’s hard for me to just be fluent with anyone. I want to feel connections, but I feel so fake when I talk to someone new. submitted by /u/ash_ok__
Originally posted by u/ash_ok__ on r/AskMen