I am a 28 year old Asian man in US working on a visa. I was always pretty introverted and a bit of a loner , but since coming to the states almost a decade ago, I have become much more of a loner .I live by myself right now and I enjoy it ,though loneliness and being by myself does have its weight. However , that is not to say I don’t “achieve“ happiness and fullfilment on my own. with this being said, I can feel my grip and desire for being social diminish, even though my desire for connection is there. I do want to connect to people and I know I will , but it’s getting way harder. I am broke and i don’t know if I ll get to stay here in the states in the long term. I have a few friends here and there but not too many. I don’t really talk at work (I dont want to but I don’t hate anybody or anything like that) and I don’t have a social circle as of right now that I regularly hang out. I have no family here as well . but I am definitely enjoying life, whatver is coming along the way. The unconscious dillema buggin me is, I know that women are much more social in general, and that modern women even go out of there to build their tribe, village and connection. Now, I don’t necessarily want to be a pure shut in and loner , but I know for a fact that Its only getting more compact (my social life from here on for the most part). i feel like this is not a good quality and definitely not an attractive quality. But i feel like this is gonna be who i am gonna be. I don’t think i will ever be a misogynist nor a manchild if i get into a relationship, but i feel this part of me will make me a very unsuitable partner for anybody. I can’t tell if this is just me being even more anti social and trying to just avoid or if it means i need to go out of my way to change myself. I don’t really know where I am going with this , but I know I don’t want to ever consider myself a loser regardless if I never secure a good relationship, however I would be lying if I said I don’t judge myself unconsciously and consciously for who I have become. I don’t know how to really wrap this thing in my head, so I am just looking for insights. thank you for listening to my word garbage if u read. submitted by /u/prince_grg
Originally posted by u/prince_grg on r/AskMen