Feeling empty and directionless and I need help. I’m failing I feel like I’m failing at life in my 30s. Need advice I don’t really know how else to say this — I feel completely stuck and like I’m just existing, not actually living. I’m a single dad. I’ve got debt. I’m working shift work and have my kids 50/50 but need to change jobs to give my kids a more stable environment, I’m keeping things afloat, but I don’t feel like I’m building anything or moving forward. Every day just feels like maintenance and I know this and can’t get started. On top of that, I’m in a relationship that’s basically falling apart. The biggest issue is I haven’t told my kids about my girlfriend. They’ve met her a few times, but only as a “friend.” I’ve never done that before, and now it feels like I’m living two separate lives. She feels hidden, and she’s hurt by it — understandably — and it’s caused constant arguments and just like my life it’s directionless because of me. At this point, everything feels messy. I don’t feel like I’m showing up properly as a dad, a partner, or even for myself. I just feel like I’m reacting to life instead of actually living it. The hardest part to admit is that I feel like I’m turning into a version of myself I don’t respect — like I’m in my 30s, stuck, stressed, in debt, in a relationship that’s barely holding together, and just kind of… failing at all of it while pretending I’m not. I don’t want my kids growing up thinking that’s what life looks like. I don’t want to be the dad they remember as someone who just couldn’t get it together because I know people can see right through me. It feels like I’m acting everyday and not genuine. I guess I’m looking for advice from anyone who’s been in this kind of place. How do you actually turn things around when your life feels like it’s falling apart at the same time as acting like it’s not? submitted by /u/leewillow5
Originally posted by u/leewillow5 on r/AskMen
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