I’ve never felt sold on the prospect of spending every single day of my life with the same person - even the ones I’ve loved. I have best friends of 30+ years who I only need 48h with before I need space and time alone. And romantic relationships are intense and more ‘needy’ in terms of expectations of give and take so 48h can be a lot. I’m not talking about sex getting stale or seeking affairs with someone else. It’s about the daily co-existence, co-habitation with the same person; lives and routines intertwined from meals to social plans to finances and families. It’s kind of intense when you think about it, isn’t it? I know you can love someone and their quirks, their repeated habits etc. But having that daily interaction… every day… ongoing…forever? Maybe it’s my introversion or avoidant attachment. I’m comfortable on my own but enjoy company in short doses. So I’m not sure I could satisfy a relationship that (as a default) expects basically all of your non working time to be spent together. I’ve had many loving relationships, with many fun and intelligent, stimulating women - but always felt after a couple of days I need a breather, alone time and they can sense it too. And I’m sort of surprised they’d want to spend all their time with me, not even being self critical. They had a life before me, don’t they have things they want to do solo occasionally? Am I alone in this feeling? Or is this something men also feel but just ‘suck it up’? Most people make this look so easy, to me it’s slightly claustrophobic. Is this avoidant attachment, neurotic - or is it a reasonable concern? submitted by /u/According_Sundae_917
Originally posted by u/According_Sundae_917 on r/AskMen