I’m curious about other men’s experiences with something I’ve been dealing with in my relationship. My girlfriend and I have had several conversations about certain situations from the past that affected her trust in me. One of them happened almost two years ago, when I was playing chess with some of her friends and she felt left out. Another was at a conference, where a girl was speaking very quietly to me, so I leaned closer to hear her and laughed awkwardly because I was confused about what she was saying. My girlfriend interpreted the interaction negatively and it affected her trust in me. I apologized for it multiple times and have genuinely tried to be more conscious of how I interact with other women. More recently, we were talking and I mentioned that I’d spoken to her brother before. She told me that she doesn’t want members of her family involved in our relationship. For context, the only interactions I’ve had with her family have been pretty limited: I briefly spoke to her father when we were involved in an accident, contacted her sister once because I couldn’t reach my girlfriend during an argument and was worried something had happened to her, and spoke with her brother once. None of these were intended to involve her family in our relationship. The part I’m interested in hearing other men’s experiences about is how you handled situations where your partner’s trust was affected by past incidents, especially when those incidents continued to come up long after you had apologized and tried to change your behavior. I’m not looking for people to diagnose my girlfriend or tell me whether I should stay or leave. I’m more interested in hearing from men who have experienced something similar: Have you had old mistakes repeatedly brought up after you apologized and changed your behavior? How did you distinguish between respecting your partner’s boundaries and feeling like you were constantly being judged for your past? Have you ever had disagreements about interacting with your partner’s friends or family? How did that work out? What did rebuilding trust actually look like in your experience? I’d especially appreciate experiences from guys who were genuinely trying to improve their behavior rather than just trying to prove that they were “right.” submitted by /u/UnusualBridge5739
Originally posted by u/UnusualBridge5739 on r/AskMen