Hey guys. This has happened 5–6 times in a row now, and both my girlfriend and I are getting frustrated. For context, I’ve never had penetrative sex before and I’m still very new to sex. I’m extremely attracted to my girlfriend, and everything works normally during foreplay. I get hard, stay hard, and feel completely into it. But the second I reach for the condom, I start thinking about whether I’m going to stay hard, and then boom I go completely soft. I think the fact that it’s happened so many times now is making it way worse. Every attempt feels like another test, and knowing that she’s disappointed/frustrated is really weighing on me. I’m starting to feel like there’s something wrong with me even though I know this is probably anxiety. The problem is I don’t know how to not think “DON’T GO SOFT” when I reach for the condom. Once that thought starts, I get nervous, notice myself losing the erection, panic more, and it’s over. Has anyone dealt with this when they were new to sex? What actually helped you break the condom/performance-anxiety loop? EDIT: I’m seeing lots of people say to make putting the condom on part of foreplay. I’ll try it and update yall if it works! submitted by /u/StormLokiPeco
Originally posted by u/StormLokiPeco on r/AskMen
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