So I’ve dated 2 guys who were passive, and have somehow ended up in a relationship with another passive guy. Alot of posts in women’s reddit forums are about their passive partners also. And alot of my friends have dated passive men. Before I’m told “surely you know how to avoid passive men if you dislike them”. Well… when me and my current partner met, he was suggesting hangouts, he was planning dates, even making entire picnics for them. We’d spend alot of time together, he’d be romantic, cook. This was the first year of our relationship. Then we moved in together and life stress happened, money issues. I admit my partner has confidence issues and depression, whilst I have my own issues too but we try out best. And now he is very passive. Apart from my current partner, I have never met or known another single guy who would bring flowers on dates, make picnics to bring, want to hangout lots, suggest and plan dates, etc. I’m not exactly the most energetic person myself either, and I do earn more than him so fully understand he won’t be suggesting dates and planning things left right and centre if he can’t afford to fulfil them. But equally, even just “wanna go for a walk” or spontaneously cuddling me or, “I saw this new market in town this weekend, want to explore it together?” - why is it alot of men don’t… care to suggest anything, choose a meal to have for dinner, etc. I love my partner to pieces, I really do, but this really makes for a heavy mental load. I know my partner grew up being told he was a disappointment and his opinion didn’t matter, which really sucks and I know is common for men. But at what point is there maybe a little healing and growth from this if it’s clearly aggravating women? submitted by /u/AsleepScholar2200
Originally posted by u/AsleepScholar2200 on r/AskMen