Just for some context, I’m a 33yr textbook morbidly obese 258lb M. Last time I had sex was 13 yrs ago, last time I was with a women ever was 2016. I’ve been depressed, lost confidence in myself, have had life altering surgeries that changed how I look and I just feel awful. I recently met someone at work who sees me for the person that I am not how I look and it’s bringing back some confidence. It’s definitely the biggest self esteem boost ever, I’m so over the moon and happy but now I’m struggling with performance. I masterbait at least once a day, almost every night in bed and it could range from 30s to 10min depending on what I want. It takes quite a bit to get an erection and if I stop I go flaccid instantly. I can never stay hard after, I also have to urinate after and honestly my penis feels like it’s been trained. I can’t remember the last time I had morning wood. When I go into bed at night it’s the only time it gets hard. It’s like it knows what’s coming. I really don’t want to be taking ED drugs at 33. I’m looking for some advice or guidance on what I can do to increase my libido and performance. Even with all of these issues and the performance anxiety I felt for the first time she was so understanding and telling me we would get through it. I’m physically and sexually attracted to her but I get nothing from the little guy down below. I want to be someone who can please her the way she wants to please me. So where can I start? Any advise is great advice. I’ve also started going back to the gym… cardio and weights. Edit: We’ve been physical, we’ve been intimate… no sex but everything else and I can’t help feeling so embarrassed when I go soft while she’s doing her thing. I hate the feeling that she might think it’s her when it’s not… it’s me. submitted by /u/aimshootdead
Originally posted by u/aimshootdead on r/AskMen