I’m a 31M and have been involved with a 24F since 2022 (about 3 years). She calls what we have a “good friendship,” but it has never felt like just a friendship to me. Over the past 3 years we have: Gone on dates regularly Taken vacations alone together Spent the night at each other’s places Been sexually intimate (no penetration, but everything else) Met up consistently and acted like a couple Despite all that, she insists we are not a couple. Things got rocky in November when we went to Las Vegas for F1. I broke a promise not to leave her alone one night. I take responsibility for that. I needed space before things escalated into a bigger fight, but she saw it as me abandoning her. After that trip, she said she didn’t think we were going to “stay together,” even though she still maintains we’re not actually together. Recently, she started hanging out with a 36-year-old male coworker. She’s technically his boss. They’ve gone out alone (Cheesecake Factory, bowling, etc.), hung out in her car after work, and also gone on double dates with another coworker and her husband. She says nothing physical has happened. The issue is I had to pry this information out of her. She wasn’t volunteering it. When I asked questions, she said I was being manipulative and that my questioning freaked her out. Now she wants space because of how intense I was about it. From my perspective, we’ve acted like a couple for 3 years, so it feels wrong that she’s going on what look like dates with another guy. From her perspective, she says we’re not a couple, so she’s free to do what she wants. As I’m writing this, she’s out with him again. Am I being controlling/manipulative for asking questions? Or am I being strung along in a situation where I’m emotionally invested but she keeps the “single” label so she has freedom? I’m genuinely trying to understand if I’m out of line here. submitted by /u/Beneficial_Two2558
Originally posted by u/Beneficial_Two2558 on r/AskMen