Original Reddit post

Hi everyone. I had posted this in another subreddit and got an overwhelming number of conflicting comments, so I’ll try here. ​ I met this guy online and we’ve been on 4 dates so far (5th one this weekend, yes it’s going slow but I don’t mind). He’s a lovely guy and we get along well, i’ve met his family and friends, he offers to drive us around to places which i’m very appreciative of. ​ One thing that’s bothering me a bit is that he hasn’t offered to pay for anything. I can understand at the start that you might not wanna spend money on someone you might not see again, but as I said we’re 4 dates in, going on 5. ​ It’s not even necessarily restaurants, like for example he was raving around this €1-2 milk-drink and I said I wanted to try it so he drove us to the shop. He picked up 2 cartons and I assumed one was for me, then he stood there staring at me for while before asking “why aren’t you grabbing one?”. Or another occasion when we were going to a cafe, and he questioned me on what my favourite coffee was (sounding like he was going to get it for me), but proceeded to only order for himself. ​ And before people say “well what have you bought him?”, I did pay for tickets to an event for us once, not crazy expensive but still. ​ I suppose I’m just not used to this dynamic, most relationships/dates ive been on the guy always pays for dinner, or they’d be very insistent on buying me a drink at the shop if I was thirsty. I’d never expect anyone to always pay for me, I have no issue paying for my own stuff, but it makes me feel almost a bit unworthy that he’s never offered? not even a cheap coffee or €1 drink? ​ He seems pretty invested otherwise, i’m supposed to go to a dinner with his family soon. What do you guys think? Am i being pedantic? How come he’s hasn’t offered? ​ ​ submitted by /u/kittycatmr

Originally posted by u/kittycatmr on r/AskMen