what solitude?
lived with an abusive partner during my 20, and it’s a medical miracle I’m alive now.
now I’ve never had a more robust and amazing social network. I could vent for hours how amazing they are. I also have a poly thing going.
go out, get shit done, meet people that get shit done, building community for yourself if the single most rewarding and important activity you can do.
because biologically. on average, men can more easily conduct violence on women.
if a partner isn’t supporting you and excited for you to improve yourself and take care of yourself, then it isn’t worth worrying about their opinion.
that being said, communication is key. tell him what you want.
no need to baby sit your partner, but they should be aware that you focusing on yourself isn’t due to a dislike for him. just that you need to focus on yourself as well.
never gotten them. I really hope the first time I get them isn’t in my funeral
get into fights/flight/fawn mode, not a good representation though. she was/still is an abusive narcissist who encouraged my suicide.
arguments should be civil and with everyone’s well-being in mind. if they feel like attacks, run away ASAP.
have a talk, phrase your concerns as “I statements”, like “I miss having sex”, or if you are worried about her mental health with all the stress. you sound like it’s not just sex, but worried the relationship is dying out rather than just changing. which you should definitely talk about.
and “scheduling” sex is helpful sometimes, especially when you’re both busy and have stress around. just block of some time for both of you to just be the both of you.
if she lost sexual interests, that is valid, can happen due to stress, medications, or just changing as a person. you should still talk to her. and reasure each other if that’s ok.
writing it?